Appreciation and Fulfilment

You can travel the whole world in search of what you need, and come home to find it!

You often look outside yourself to satisfy your desires. You crave for more, for something different. You want easy solutions, instant fixes to your problems, coming from external sources. You do this instead of developing your ability to live happily in the present moment. But appreciation comes from the inside. No matter how small or big something is, you need to be grateful for it before you can enjoy it. This is a quality you can develop in your daily life.

By looking with fresh eyes at ordinary things like a rose, a rainbow in a puddle, or the intricacy of a spider web, you practice enjoying these. You practice saying "thank you" while rewarding yourself with instant bliss. You practice feeling good, even when adversity strikes. It's even more important to be grateful during difficult times, as it will help you get over hurdles quickly and with a minimum of pain. A person who is appreciative can face all sorts of obstacles and shortages, while still having a contented heart.

Appreciation brings fulfilment. The more you appreciate everything in your life, the more fulfilment you'll have! When you're grateful for something, life will give you more of it. Life is a never-ending source of positive, healing energy that's there for everyone, not only a few chosen ones. When you feel blessed, you attract more blessings.

Every morning, look at yourself in the mirror, smile and say to yourself: "Something good is going to happen to me today." Say it with emphasis, with emotion. Be open to the possibility that you may actually be lucky for a change. Life responds to whatever you think and say. Say good things about yourself,  about others, and about the world in general. Love life, and life will love you!

"We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognising and appreciating what we do have." - Frederick Koenig

With lots of love,

Bella

Painting:"Little Pink Rose" by Matthew Bates

Start Every Day with Hope in your Heart...

"There is a crack, a crack in everything. That's how the light gets in." - Leonard Cohen (Anthem - from his album The Future).

Let the light come in through the cracks of your being. Allow the positive energy of HOPE to infuse you today. Bask in it, bathe in it, let it penetrate every pore of your skin.

Hope is at your fingertips. Forget your regrets about yesterday, and forget your worries about tomorrow. Become totally lost in the present. That's where your point of power is, right here, in the now.

Every day brings with it unlimited possibilities, new challenges and choices that are yours to make. Allow the grace and beauty of a new sunrise to touch your soul. Remove your shackles; let go of yesterday's sadness and grief. There is so much love and joy around you, but it's up to you to allow them into your experience.

Hope is an expectation in our heart of good things to come. No matter what problem you're facing right now, you know that it will get better. you trust the world to be on your side and give you the answers you need. You trust that no matter how desperate a situation is, improvement is always possible. You trust that after the rain, there will be sunshine again.

Hope is a burning flame that will never go out. Hope is life itself. It's what keeps you going, no matter what you're going through! Your wishes are there to come true. Eventually, what you pray for will become a reality...

With much love,

Bella

"God is a shower to the heart burned up with grief. God is a sun to the face deluged with tears." - Joseph Roux, Meditations of a Parish Priest.

Painting: "Sunrise" by Margret Hofheinz-Doring, 1910-1994, German.

Fear is a Habit You Can Undo!

"Fear is a habit; so is self-pity, defeat, anxiety, despair, hopelessness and resignation. You can eliminate all of these negative habits with two simple resolves: I can! and I will!" - Unknown

In my book "The Magic of Willpower" I explain that a habit is something you do over and over, on a daily basis, until it becomes automatic. Repetition leads to routine, and soon this "habit" becomes a part of you, like the clothes you wear. It seems fairly easy to form new habits, but it's a lot harder to get rid of old ones. The secret to eliminating unwanted habits is to replace them with new ones that will serve you better. Ditch your negative thoughts and adopt a positive, non-judgmental way of thinking, and it will become a natural part of you!

Like a lot of people, you may approach challenges with anxiety and worry instead of trust. Straight away, you recall past experiences, and tend to compare what's happening now with what happened back then, and draw conclusions. You tend to believe that it will turn out the same way... And you decide to avoid certain situations altogether, or you approach them with negative expectations.

"Once bitten, twice shy" is a saying a lot of people tend to live by, either consciously or subconsciously. But is it really worth it, imagining the worst case scenario, just because in the past it happened that way, and you have been scarred by these traumatic events? Why not start the day with a fresh outlook, and a brand new hope in your heart - and the certainty that things will work out for the best this time?

Just because you suffered a bad experience in the past doesn't mean it will repeat itself. It won't necessarily be the same this time! Circumstances may be similar, and yet outcomes can be totally different. You may harbour a deep fear of being hurt - but in most cases, you're the one who chooses to be injured.

You might not be able to choose your circumstances, but you can choose your thoughts, feelings, actions and reactions. Imagination is a powerful tool. It allows you to project yourself into the future in a positive, constructive way - instead of feeling sorry for yourself and stuck in an uncomfortable place.

You can move forward without fear and without hesitation. You can enjoy the present without having to worry about the future. You can live for this moment... All you need to do is let go of excuses and seize the day. This is your life... Make the most out of it. Never allow fear to hold you back!

With love and warm thoughts,

Bella

Paiting:"Dragonfly" by Stephanie Estrin, USA

How to Forget Something or Someone

"To forgive is wisdom, to forget is genius. And easier. Because it's true. It's a new world every heart beat." - Joyce Cary, The Horse's Mouth

To stop thinking about something or someone may seem like a tall order, especially when you're in the middle of a crisis like ill health, job loss or separation. How to do it may seem difficult, but there is an easy and straightforward way to go about it. Putting this simple strategy into practice however takes commitment and some practice.

Whenever you find yourself thinking about something unpleasant, something in your life that bothers you, or a person you would like to get out of your mind, gently but firmly direct your thoughts away from it and towards something or someone that makes you feel better.

Do this repeatedly and consistently, whenever an unwanted thought pops up in your mind. Over time this strategy will become automatic. And when something becomes a habit, it requires less and less effort, as I explain in my book, "The Magic of Willpower". In the beginning you might struggle but after a while it will become natural: this way of thinking will become a part of you. You will apply it to other situations, like when you worry too much, or when you're stuck in a negative thinking pattern.

The thought in itself is not a problem. The real problem is the tendency we have as human being to feel sorry for ourselves, and wanting other people to feel sorry for us too. It's almost as if we get a warped sense of satisfaction from it! Feeling bad can be addictive in a crazy sort of way, but it won't help us move forward. The problem is still there, and we won't resolve it by dwelling on it. We need to let it go, no matter what.

Do you want to embark on an endless cycle of thinking about something or someone you want to forget? Once you understand how useless it is to hold onto painful memories and feelings, you can start choosing thoughts that are not so painful, and that give you a sense of hope and relief. Choose something that feels a bit better, like "I have family and friends who will helps me and give me moral support", "There will be a solution to my money problem", "Children are resilient and they will adjust to it."

You may be caught in a difficult situation, but you are free to choose thoughts that are positive and encouraging. Forgetting someone is not easy, but you can do it by shifting your attention to something else. Focus on improving your life, on making the most out of what you've got rather than what you've lost. Distract yourself with meaningful and joyful activities. Put all your attention on the present moment, without drifting into the past or future. 

With loving thoughts,

Bella

Painting: "Forger Me Not" by Derick Burleson, Alaska, 2010

Be Happy Now!

"In the depths of winter I finally learned there was in me an invincible summer." - Albert Camus
"But what is happiness except the simple harmony between a man and the life he leads?" - Albert Camus.

Happiness is everything, and you need to extract it from every moment of your life! Infuse it with all the joy that you can conjure up, no matter where you are and what you're doing...

Set your self a goal: it will give your life purpose and direction. Imagine arriving at your desired destination after a long and often difficult journey. At the end, you will reap the rewards for your efforts. But in the meantime, you can feel happiness too. You can enjoy the road you're taking, what I call the "process" in my book, "The Magic of Willpower". If you can find pleasure in the steps you're taking towards your dream, you're halfway there! 

Be happy now. Don't wait until you have more money, or a new job, or you've met that special person, or your illness goes away... 

Sometimes bad things happen to you. You feel sad; you feel the need to grieve - and that's okay. Accept it as a part of your journey. 

How you feel in this moment is up to you. It's your choice. You can choose to be happy, even though the world around you seems to be crumbling. Joy is a gift you can create for yourself. Take charge of your feelings; take charge of your happiness - as from today.

Seek the light instead of the shadows... Seek the sunshine, even if it rains. Look at the rainbow in the sky.

Seek the invincible summer inside of you. 

Treasure your happiness. And above all, share it with others!

With love,

Bella

Painting: "Paysage colore aux oiseaux aquatiques" by Jean Metzinger, 1907, France