How Can You Improve Your Self-Esteem?

" I am a wonderful and unique human being."
"I am a good person and I deserve good things to happen to me."

What effect do these words have on you? Do you feel a bit queasy? Do you feel your throat constricting, your eyes welling up with tears?

Give up the idea of self-improvement, and switch to self-acceptance. Accept yourself exactly as you are, even and especially if you're overweight, unfit, unmotivated or if you have an addiction. Accept yourself if you're going through a difficult time, with your boss, spouse, parents, children, or neighbours. Problematic relationships, health issues and financial struggles can really pull you down. 

Be aware of your fears and let them go, one by one. Hard times will test you, but a positive attitude towards yourself will pave the way for positive outcomes, because you know you're worth it, and you know that everything will be all right in the end.

Mirror work is like a magic wand when developing a positive self-image. After all, this is what you see in the mirror: the image of your own self. Mirror work is very simple and doesn't require much time. In the morning, say "I love you" to yourself, while looking deep into your own eyes. Don't be phoney about it. Really mean it, from the bottom of your heart. Repeat the same thing at night, before going to bed. 

Morning and night is the minimum, but you can do it as many times as you need during the day. Every time you feel discouraged or depressed, go to the mirror, and tell yourself how much you love yourself. You will soon notice an enormous difference in your life.

Never belittle or put yourself down. Use affirmation when you think or talk about yourself. Affirmation are positive statements you repeat over and over to condition your subconscious - as a result you will begin to think differently:

- I love and accept myself unconditionally.
- I approve of myself and feel great about myself.
- I radiate love and respect and in return, I get love and respect.
- I am a well-loved and respected person.
- I accept others as they are and they accept me as I am.
- It matters little what others say. What matters is how I react, and what I believe.
- I deserve all that is good. I release any need for misery or suffering.
- I release the need to be a victim. I am a powerful person and have full control over my life.
- I release the need to prove myself to others, as I am who I am, and I love it that way.
- I am solution minded. Any problem that shows up in my life is solvable.
- I am never alone. God supports me and is with me, every step of the way.
- My mind is filled with positive, loving and healthy thoughts that are reflected in my life experience.
- My mind is full of gratitude for my precious, wonderful life.
- I release the past and live only in the present. I enjoy my life to the fullest.

Self-esteem is how you see yourself, and therefore look after yourself. If your self-esteem is healthy, you will take good care of yourself. You will eat a balanced diet and exercise regularly. You will get sufficient sleep and drink your eight glasses of water a day. You will attract relationships that are good for you. You will avoid stress, cultivate peace of mind and practice non-violent communication. You will strive for understanding, instead of conflict.

Forgive yourself for all your past mistakes, without exceptions. Guilt is a useless emotion. Make a commitment to treat yourself well, starting from this very moment. Set small, achievable goals for yourself. Look after your body: it's the only one you have. Take time to do something nice for yourself. 

Relax in the knowledge that all is well and continues to be well. Problems come and go, but the love you have for yourself will always be there.

With all my love,

Bella

Painting: "Garrowby Hill" by David Hockney

Why is it Good to Eat a Diet High in Fiber?

Eating fiber is like house cleaning. If you don't clean your house, it becomes messy and dirty. It becomes smelly; things are hard to find, and you feel uncomfortable in it. Germs start festering and you may contract respiratory or skin infections. You may develop asthma due to the dust. 

House cleaning is a routine that most people don't question because it makes sense to them. You feel more contented and relaxed when your house is tidy and hygienic. You also understand why it's necessary to clean your body from the outside and have regular showers or baths. Just like it is essential to clean your house and take showers, it is vitally important to clean your body from the inside.

Fiber scrapes your intestines, like a brush removing dirt and grime from a surface, and in the process your whole body is cleansed. Soluble fiber dissolves in water and turns into a gel-like substance that soaks up impurities, excess bile and cholesterol. It makes you feel full, so you tend to eat less. It also delays the absorption of carbohydrates, thus stabilizing blood sugar levels and preventing hunger pangs. You can find soluble fiber in oats, fruit, vegetables, peas and beans. 

With the help of insoluble fiber, waste matter is rapidly transported out of your body. Insoluble fiber adds bulk to your food, and prevents constipation, by accelerating your intestinal transit. Toxic substances don't linger in your body, and are less likely to be absorbed into your bloodstream. With insoluble fiber, a high percentage of calories is carried away and wasted before it can be utilized: great news for people intending to lose weight or maintain their current weight. You can find insoluble fiber in whole grain foods, nuts, seeds, lentils and the skins of fruits and vegetables

Soluble fiber is the brush, broom, mop, cleaning cloth, sponge, or vacuum cleaner that gathers all the dirt, sucks it up, leaving surfaces clean and sparkling. Insoluble fibre carries the result, whatever is in the dustpan, bucket, cloth, sponge or vacuum cleaner bag, out into the garbage can.

When your daily food intake is high in fiber, your feel better. Your health automatically begins to improve. You lose any excess weight and maintain your ideal body shape. You feel energetic and rejuvenated. You sleep better and think more clearly. You're in a cheerful mood and have more enthusiasm. You feel lighter and more optimistic.

Your immune system works better. Fiber reduces inflammation in your body, and lowers your risk of heart disease and diabetes. Another bonus: you look fresher, as your skin becomes smooth with a healthy glow. If you suffer from acne or fungal infections, a diet high in fiber may be the solution. After just a few weeks, you will notice great improvements. 

Enjoy a healthy day today,

Bella

Wat is Enlightenment?

Enlightenment is your ultimate goal. Every day brings you closer to this state of mind, in which there is no room for dramas or petty arguments. When you cultivate enlightenment, your consciousness begins to shift. You begin to see the bigger picture. You ask yourself,  "Does it really matter?" or "Do I really have to prove that I am right?"

Why not let it go? Fighting uses up more energy than giving in. Instead of arguing and stubbornly sticking to your point of view, why not do things differently for a change? You can put yourself in the other person's shoes. You can listen to this person, and offer them unlimited understanding and compassion.

Enlightenment allows you to reach a higher level of consciousness. You become more detached, without turning into a robot. Your human heart is not only intact, it is magnified. From now on, you choose NOT to react blindly to what people are doing or saying. You become more introspective. You become aware of your thought processes and how they influence your emotions. You start seeing things from a different perspective, in a different light. You realise that true knowledge comes from the heart, not the head. It shines a light on the darkness inside of you and all around you.

As you become enlightened, you turn into a shining light yourself. You attract other people to you: people who want to be like you, people who want what yo've got. You become a leader to them, a role model. You don't talk about your knowledge; you don't brag. You simply live that way because it makes you feel better, more at peace with yourself and the world.

Enlightenment means you are becoming lighter. All of a sudden, your daily burden is not so heavy any more. Life becomes easier, as you don't take things so much to heart any more. You're not so serious any more; you lighten up and develop a sense of humour. You realise that life is full of problems, but it is also full of solutions and opportunities.

Enlightenment is not something you need to strive for all the time. It is not out of your reach. On the contrary, it is right here, right in front of you, if you open yourself to it. Open your heart to the  light. Let go of your problems, your resentments, your anger, your unfulfilled desires. You inner light will shine and become stronger. It will become your reality, day after day.

Your journey of inner transformation is beginning right now, at this very moment. It's happening while you're reading this! Enjoy it, and have a beautiful, light-filled day.

With all my love,

Bella

Painting:"Large Orange Lotus" by Paul Heussenstamm

How to Give up Smoking without Gaining Weight

"The true face of smoking is disease, death and horror - not the glamour and sophistication the pushers in the tobacco industry try to portray." - David Byrne ('Talking Heads')

Giving up smoking is, without doubt, one of the best decisions you'll ever make for your health. The question is: how can you do it without putting on weight? While most people only gain an average of less five to seven kilos, this can be enough to deter you from ditching this deathly habit.

Nicotine is an appetite suppressant, and has been used since Pre-Colombian times to stave off hunger. Teenage girls with weight problems often take up smoking in the hope that it will help them control their eating. But this is only a bandaid solution, as they don't address the real problem: why they are gaining weight in the first place.

Nicotine slightly increases your metabolism, making you burn more calories. When you quit smoking, you may experience a decline in your metabolic rate. This is only temporary though, as your body will soon adjust to the absence of nicotine in your bloodstream. Your metabolism will even become more efficient as your kidneys and liver regenerate and start working better.

Nicotine increases the level of certain neurotransmitters in the brain, in particular Serotonin and Dopamine. Serotonin is a 'feel-good' neurotransmitter. Low levels of this substance lead to irritability, moodiness, lack of concentration, and food cravings. You go straight to the pantry and grab whatever you can find, as long as it has sugar in it! Dopamine stimulates the reward centre in the brain. This is why it is so difficult to give up smoking.

To increase your Serotonin levels you need to follow a diet high in carbohydrates. Only carbohydrates in combination with Insulin can raise the amount of this neurotransmitter in your brain. Refined sugar is a no-no; focus instead on healthy carbs: whole grains (wholemeal pasta, brown rice and oats), legumes (beans and lentils), fruit and vegetables.

If you frequently feel like snacking, choose your in-between meals carefully. Pack them in advance in plastic containers or zip-lock bags. An apple or a banana are easy to carry around and don't need special packaging. Always carry a bottle of water with you, and have a sip whenever you feel the urge to put something in your mouth. You could ad lemon juice to it - it tastes more interesting and will help detoxify your body.

Take up some form of moderate exercise, as it will lift your spirit and give you a sense of accomplishment. It will take your mind off smoking, as you're focusing on moving your body. Exercise stimulates your metabolism and the productions of Endorphins (natural morphine). This is why exercise makes you feel so good. As you remain smoke-free over a longer period of time, your lung capacity increases.  As your body begins to recover, you will experience surges of energy and vitality. Your level of fitness will increase dramatically, and soon you will want to run a marathon or do the Rottnest Channel Swim!

Ask yourself why you took up smoking in the first place. Was it peer pressure? Boredom? Loneliness? Feelings of inadequacy? Restlessness? Not knowing what to do when on a break or when sitting at home? It is important to clarify this, and to compensate for it, if you want to successfully quit the habit without putting on weight. The main thing is to keep your hands occupied, which is easy today with smart phones. Alternatively, you could take up gardening, knitting, crochet, drawing, pottery, painting or playing a musical instrument...

With love,

Bella

Free Yourself from Your Worries

We humans tend to worry about everything and anything. We envisage the worst possible scenarios. We forget to enjoy the present moment, while obsessing about things that haven't happened yet and that might never happen. 

Just imagine you decide to quit your job, because of the stress and dissatisfaction you experience at work. After a while, when you've used up most of your savings, you begin to worry: "What if I can't afford my house, my car or my credit repayments?" "What if I lose my home?" But what if you don't? 

These things might not necessarily occur. You might find a better job. You might find another source of income, like starting your own business. But when you focus on being without a job and without money, these aspects will prevail in your life, because your thoughts will keep you stuck in a place of fear and anxiety.

As yourself, "What's the worst that could happen?"- and how would you react? Surely, it would not be the end of the world if you lost your car or your credit card. As you focus on the positive aspects of your life, you will have a sense of relief and begin to feel better. For instance, because you have a healthy body and mind, you realise you're rich compared to a lot of people who aren't as lucky as you are. Like the saying goes, "I complained that I had no shoes until I met someone who had no feet."

Relax. Stop worrying. Remember that when you're down, you can only go up. When things are bad, they can only get better. Improvement is the natural order of things. There is always hope, no matter how desperate your situation seems to be right now.  Distract yourself to take your mind off of your troubles. Go for a walk, spend time with your children or friends, read a book, watch a movie, do some cooking or cleaning. Be playful and cultivate a sense of humour.

"I have learned to be satisfied with the things I have... I know how to live when I am poor, and I know how to live when I have plenty. I have learned the secret of being happy at any time." (Philippians 4:11-12)

With all my love,

Bella

Painting by Veronique Godbout ("Birds")

Six small meals are better than three big ones for weight loss and wellbeing

Many of us grew up eating three 'square' meals a day: breakfast, lunch and dinner. But there is increasing scientific evidence that it is preferable to eat several small meals a day, rather than three large ones.

A Canadian study observed two groups of individuals. One group followed an ordinary three-meals-a-day diet, while the second group had to eat several small meals throughout the day. Both groups were given the same amount of calories to consume. At the end of the study, individuals in the second group had lost considerable more weight, while showing lower LDL cholesterol levels (the 'bad' cholesterol that clogs up your arteries). Blood sugar levels were also lower and more stable in the second group.

Weight loss plans can be daunting because of all the restrictions they involve. But if you're allowed to 'refuel' more often, it means more opportunities to look forward to eating something, as well as sustained energy throughout your day. You're less likely to be hungry, while avoiding energy dips and cravings. You feel more satisfied and more secure, knowing that you can eat many times during the day and won't have to wait too long for your next meal.

Eating alone increases your metabolic rate: this is the 'thermic' effect of food. You will lose weight more easily if you spread your calories throughout the day rather than grouping them into three big meals. With smaller quantities of food, your stomach tends to shrink and you will be satisfied sooner. Large meals are unhealthy as they are followed by a spike in blood sugar and insulin, followed by a low mid-morning or mid-afternoon.

When you have a small meal in front of you, your instinct tells you to eat it slowly, in order to make it last longer. You tend to enjoy it more, savouring every mouthful. You automatically increase your chewing time and appreciate your food better. This helps your digestive system, while enabling your brain to register the feeling of fullness.

Mindless snacking can be detrimental: chips, lollies, chocolates and sugary biscuits will not assist your quest for better health! Plan your meals carefully. Fill your fridge with fruit and vegetables, or start growing them yourself. Fruit and vegetables are your staple items. A banana or an apple make perfect snacks. Also include whole grains, legumes, seeds and nuts in your diet. By following these guidelines, you will soon enjoy a new healthy body and clear thinking mind.

With much love and encouragement,

Bella