The True Meaning of Christmas and the New Year

"Do not love the world or anything in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For everything in the world - the craving of sinful man, the lust of his eyes and the boasting of what he has or what he does - does not come from the Father but from the world. The world and its desires pass away, but the one who does the will of God lasts forever." - 1 John 2 (15-17)

Christmas symbolises unselfishness and generosity. It is a time of giving and being together to celebrate the birth of Jesus. Jesus is the light of the world and the light that shines within each of us.  We are born to new life as He was born in the manger of Bethlehem. We are ready to leave what is unwanted behind and embrace new habits, a new lifestyle, a new attitude towards ourselves, others and the world. As we discover what is really important to us and what we really want, we are ready to transform our lives. This is what I write about in my book "The magic of Willpower". There is a kind of magic when this happens, because everything falls into place, and instead of being at war with ourselves, we are at peace and we don't have to struggle to lose weight, give up smoking or drinking or controlling our anger. 

Christ is pure love and He dwells in each of us. Christ is the epitome of our highest ideals, of goodness, patience, compassion and affection. Christ is healing and growth and replaces dysfunction and destruction. "Do not love the world" means: do not thirst for status or material goods. We may be the hard working type and have a lot of ambition, chase after a lot of things, but this is not what Christ is about.  Or we can be the "lazy" type and give in to every whim and desire - with an attitude of instant gratification that may lead to painful problems such as feeling guilt and shame and having unhealthy relationships. It can also lead to being overweight or addicted to certain substances or  behaviours. 

Christmas and the New Year are a time of feasting and letting go before the first of January, a new beginning, with your New Year resolutions. Don't be too hard on yourself if you want these resolutions to last. Small changes are all you need to begin with. Look at the big picture. Listen to your inner voice and cultivate hope in your heart - no matter where you're at right now, it can only get better. 

With lots of love and my best wishes,

Bella

Painting: "The Nativity of Christ" by Vladimir Borokovsky, 1790 - 1825, Russia.

Surrender and Go with the Flow

"Always say "yes" to the present moment. What could be more futile, more insane, than to create inner resistance to what already is? What could be more insane than to oppose life itself, which is now and always now? Surrender to what is. Say "yes" to life - and see how life suddenly starts working for you rather than against you." - Eckhart Tolle

"If you just go with the flow, no matter what weird things happen along the way, you always end up
where you belong." - Tom Upton, Just Plain Weird.

This is an intelligent, friendly Universe, and it's so well orchestrated that there is no need to control anything. If you could just stop having regrets about the past and worrying about the future, you would be much better off and you would instantly feel better. At the core of your wish to manipulate others and circumstances lies FEAR. The fear that things won't turn out the way you want them to if you just let go.

The opposite of fear is love and trust. Love your life, love your circumstances and the people around you and trust that everything will be all right, even though you might be in the middle of a challenging situation. Allow things to unfold naturally, without interfering. Allow others to be who themselves, without attempting to change them and direct them. If you let go of resistance and enjoy the present moment, you will open yourself to endless possibilities. Life will be without limitation, instead of being an imitation, and it will take you to wonderful places.

Bury the hatchet and wave your peace banner. Let go of vengeful thoughts. Buddha said that resentment is like holding on to a hot coal, with the intention of throwing it at someone else; you're the one who gets burned! Make peace with others, but also make peace with yourself and your circumstances. Start where you are, and don't wait for the future to fulfil your expectations.

Everything you need is in the present moment, and every minute is an opportunity to heal and grow and have a positive outlook on life. Stop wasting your energy fighting things; it just causes stress - and stress is a killer! Choose serenity instead - remain cool, calm and collected, no matter what. Make it your philosophy that this is the best of all possible worlds, and it will be that way for you.

Surrender, forgive, go with the flow and enjoy every moment of this great journey...

With all my love,

Bella

Photo: "Black Swan" by Bella Tindale

Life is Like a River

"Eventually, all things merge into one, and a river runs through it." - Norman Fitzroy Maclean

We were born out of the sea and as we emerged from non-being into being, we were given awareness...  Life first existed in the sea, and then it grew out of it. Without life there is no awareness. There is no death; there is only life, and when the pure energy becomes physical, it expresses itself in that form. Awareness began growing in the sea, in the water, and developed from it, and manifested itself in the wonders of nature, in the creation of animals and humans. 

Life is like water, forever flowing, never ending, taking us with it. Its irresistible current pulls us and carries us like a pair of strong arms... We are like water, always moving, on a journey of discovery, heading back to the sea, the mother of all things (the French word for sea is "la mer", the mother...) We are on a journey to return to ourselves. Our days are easily absorbed by the sandy river banks, and often wasted, as we've lost our purpose, as we've lost the true meaning of life...

We continue to be pulled along and the current is sometimes fast, and sometimes slow. We have new adventures, we see new faces, and wander in wonder through exotic places. But the destination is the same: it's a return to our origins, to the beginning of Life itself.

Go with the flow, and give all the love you can while you're on this extraordinary journey. Turn your attention inward, to your thoughts, your feelings. Envision life like water, like a mighty river. Don't go against it; let it take you with it. Eventually, you will overcome all your struggles and difficulties.

With much love,

Bella

Photo: "River Congo" by Sophie Kratz

Live a Healthy Life for a Healthy Future

"The greatest wealth is health." - Vigil

You may be able to amass a lot of wealth over the years, but without your health you won't be able to enjoy it... You may be able to achieve great heights in our professional life, but what will it mean to you without wellbeing?

The only way to feel joy is to feel good within yourself, to feel at ease. The word dis-ease reflects the imbalance caused by a body that is out of tune. This is often due to the abuse we inflict on it, and to a detrimental lifestyle. On top of that you may be experiencing a lot of stress, which makes you feel powerless and even more likely to succumb to harmful habits. 

In my book "The Magic of Willpower" I will show you how to break this cycle and develop a way of life that is totally suited to the person you are. I will give you strategies to overcome any obstacles you may encounter along the way. Every day, you have the opportunity to look after your body and your mind to the best of your ability. Now is the time to begin, not tomorrow or next month or next year, or when this or that has happened. You can't keep making excuses. It's time to take things into your hands and to look after yourself. Whatever you decide to do today has a direct impact on your future health.

Drinking too much alcohol, smoking or overeating as well as taking unnecessary drugs have cumulative effects on your inner organs, and accelerate the ageing and degeneration process. Addictions are often hard to break. However, you can do it if you go back to the root of the problem: what caused you to turn to this addiction in the first place. Negative thinking, worries and anxiety, the fear you won't be able to cope may have influenced you in that direction. 

To be successful in giving up a substance or an unwanted behaviour, it's important to take your focus away from it and give your attention to the advantages of a life free of addiction: the physical and psychological benefits will be enormous and you will enjoy life and cope with problems a lot better. 

Less junk food for instance, and more fruit and vegetables, means more energy and endurance to do things that are pleasurable, such as pursuing a hobby or taking up an exercise routine. It will also make you more confident when meeting new people, as you will have this healthy glow about you!

Who we are, what we look like and how we feel: these are the consequences of our actions over a lifetime. We experience health problems as a result of negative habits. These habits have a profound effect over a number of years. But we are not helpless when it comes to our health, and we can actively do something about it. It's never too late to change. 

If you already have a chronic condition like high blood pressure or diabetes, a positive lifestyle will improve your overall health and your condition might even disappear. If you have a more serious condition such as cancer, a healthy lifestyle will boost your immune system and help you deal with pain and discomfort. Exercise too is a great immune and mood enhancer.

There is no bodily condition that can't be improved. The change begins in the mind as you become aware of your choices. Think about what you can do for yourself today: drink a lot of water, eat a variety of fresh foods, get some exercise and adequate rest. And above all, RELAX and put your worries aside!

With much love,

Bella

Painting: "Trees. Study" by Fyodor Vasilyev, Russia, 1870

We Are Like Actors in a Play

"All the world's a stage, 
And all the men and women merely players." - Shakespeare, As You Like it.

"We're actors in our lives, pretending to be
who we want people to think we are." - Simone Elkeles, author of Perfect Chemistry.

Just like an actor in a play or a movie, you have a role in your life. God is like a casting director who decides which character you will play in the big production called "life" - your life. Every person on this planet is in the same boat, meaning in the same situation, but not necessarily in the same movie. Your movie is unlike anyone else's. And while the Divine has assigned you a role without consulting you, you  can edit the script by making choices. You have a certain freedom, even though you may not be able change your body, your mind, your talents, your aspirations. Reflect on all the people that have lived, are living and will live in the future. Some will act in a short drama, others in a long one. Some lives resembles a tragedy, some a comedy at times... 

Although you can't always control the role that's been given to you, you can act as best as you possibly can and avoid complaining about it. Be grateful that you can take part in this production. You were chosen for this part, as God knew that you were totally suited for it! So no matter how difficult it seems at times, just being able to participate in this adventure is a unique and mind-blowing opportunity. From now on, whatever your circumstances, think about the big picture: your movie. Aim at giving an impeccable performance, but don't beat yourself up if you make mistakes... 

Even though you're playing a role, there is no need to be phoney. Ultimately, you'll be the spectator of your life, and you'll be pleased to see someone you can relate to, someone you can empathise with. If you're in harmony with who you really want to be, your true self, your performance will be genuine. You'll be able to look into your own eyes without apprehension. Put the past behind you and don't dwell on sad times, on injustices or missed opportunities. Move forward and live in this moment, looking ahead for good things to come.

Be kind and generous and forgiving - but don't try to please others at all cost. What they think about you makes no difference to who you are and what you're experiencing. Appreciate this role, this life you've been given and just be yourself.

With all my love,

Bella

Painting: "Arlequin, Pierrot and Scapin" by Antoine Watteau, French painter, 1716 (Wikipaintings)

Happiness Can Only Be Found Within

"Happiness doesn't depend on any external conditions, it is governed by our mental attitudes." - Dale Carnegie

"Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it." - Groucho Marx

Freedom may be the only worthy goal in life, and it is won by not paying attention to things that lie beyond your control. You can't have a joyful heart if your mind is full of fear and insecurity. 

Your happiness depends on three things, and all of them are within your power: your will, your ideas concerning events in which you're involved, and the use you make of these ideas. 

Genuine happiness is always independent of external conditions. This is why you need to practice being indifferent to them. What's happening is not worth mulling over if it's not desirable in your eyes. Disregard negative evidence and cling to your inner reality, no matter what. This is the only way you will find the authentic happiness you're seeking.

It's easy to be mislead by appearances. Job titles, degrees, honours, fame, fancy possessions, designer clothes and good looks can be deceiving. Don't make the mistake of assuming that celebrities, public figures, political leaders, the wealthy, or people with great intellectual or artistic gifts are necessarily happy! To do so is to allow yourself to be manipulated by appearances. It will do nothing for your confidence and self-esteem; it will only make you doubt yourself. Never make any assumptions about others, even if they seem very successful. 

Real satisfaction only comes from things that are under your own control. Keep this in mind, and you'll never find yourself envious of other people, or feeling sorry for yourself. You won't blame others or your circumstances for your problems, but you will begin to take responsibility for the way you feel. You won't compare yourself and your accomplishments to others any more. 

Stop wanting to be anyone other than your own best self: this is something that's within your control, something you can achieve, today and every day... This is your path to freedom and a happiness greater than anything you've experienced so far!

With much love and best wishes,

Bella

Photo by Bella Tindale

Practice Being Optimistic

"Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope."- Helen Keller

"He who is in harmony with himself is in harmony with the universe." - Marcus Aurelius


When something happens to you, you tend to react immediately, based on the emotion you feel. You think, "This person was very rude to me. Now I'm upset!" The thought comes first, then the emotion. You interpret a situation in a certain way then respond to it emotionally, which in turn makes you take action. You might get angry or simply walk away, eyes downcast, with a bad feeling in your stomach...

Reacting with negative emotion creates anger, fear, jealousy, boredom, annoyance, frustration and even despair. All these feelings have nothing to do with what's happening on the outside. The process begins in the mind. Bodily sensations follow and this is the beginning of disease ("dis-ease"). Stress causes more illnesses than all the viruses and bacterias put together!

To avoid this gloomy scenario, practice being optimistic. It's often easier said than done, but it is possible, even in the midst of a not-so pleasant situation.  Have trust in the Flow of Life, and trust that the end result of this event or problem will be to your benefit, not your detriment. In the end, everything will be all right. When you focus on a problem, you feel bad - but when you focus on a solution or a positive outcome you immediately feel better. 

In optimism there is magic, but in pessimism there is nothing. In positive expectation there is elation and success. But in pessimism or the acknowledgement of what is not wanted there is absolutely nothing, just more negativity. Redefine your relationship with Life today. Do it now, because this is the only time you can do it. Not tomorrow and not next year. 

You don't need to lie to yourself, to say that something is exactly the way you want it when it's not. All you need to do is look at things in a different light, from a different perspective. Think about topics you find interesting and appealing. Visit new places and talk to different people. Do whatever makes you feel good and in harmony with the Stream of Life.

Familiarise yourself with the joy of being alive and being one with the Universe and remember: whatever you give out will come back to you a hundredfold...

With much love,

Bella

Photo by Nina Tindale