Happiness doesn't depend on the things you want

"We can be grateful for music, silence, kind words, beautiful words, art, blank canvasses, space, night, sun, rain, amazing plants, animals..." - Jay Woodman

We often think that if only we had this or that, we would finally be happy. The truth is that all the things people want have little effect on the long-term happiness they derive as a result of obtaining these things. We tend to see material objects as a way of defining or creating a form of happiness that constantly eludes us, rather than enjoying the things we already possess and treating anything additional as a bonus, something that ads interest and variety to an already fulfilled life.

What things would make you happy? The fact that you need to ask yourself this question means that you need to examine your values and reassess your priorities. Material possessions will never have anything but a fleeting effect on your happiness, unless you’ve been denied basic necessities like food and decent housing. 

The rush of exhilaration you get from buying new things you’ve wished for may be real, but it doesn’t last very long. It’s a short-term thrill that has little or no impact on your overall happiness. If you want to experience real and long-lasting contentment, you need to acknowledge the good in your life now, the things that you often take for granted. We compulsively look for lack and shortages while forgetting the blessings, the things to be grateful for. 

The quickest and easiest way to develop an abundance mindset is to focus on what you’ve got, rather than complaining about the things you haven't got. Every morning and every night, think about all the things you’ve been blessed with in your life. Acknowledge them and express your gratitude in a way that makes sense to you. Some people like to say a prayer, but you could simply say thank you to yourself.

"When I wake up each morning, I praise the Lord for the gift of being alive." - Lailah Gifty Akita

With love,

Bella

Painting: 'Sea Shell' by Amy Lowell

Three Solutions for Eating Healthy - Starting Today!

In today’s busy and super-fast, high-tech world, it can be a real challenge to eat healthily, especially if you work full time and have a family to look after. You come home exhausted, and quickly grab something on the way, like Mac Donald’s or Pizza Hut. As long as there is food on the table, you don’t care what it is, and as long as your husband (or wife) and kids don’t complain. But this morning, you feel guilty as you notice that your waistline has been expanding progressively over the last few months or years. You promise yourself that you will start eating a healthy diet, no matter what. You promise yourself that today is the day that you will begin to change your eating habits and consume more vegetables, more salads, more wholegrain foods, while cutting down on junk food once and for all... But there are always excuses!

The first one is that fast food is cheaper. I have often thought that this was true. It also seems more convenient. But when you really ad it up, it’s not entirely accurate. You need your car to go to Mac Donald’s, so you end up using up at least a few dollars in petrol. If you go to the market or a wholesale fruit and vegetable outlet, you will find fresh, wholesome products at a reasonable price. You can go there once or twice a week to stock up on fruit, vegetables, nuts and lentils. At first glance it seems trouble-free to purchase burgers and fries. It’s not that easy when you spend twenty minutes in a queue during busy times, waiting for your big mac or happy meals and chocolate sundaes to be handed to you, while your kids are fighting in the back seat, only to find out that the teenager behind the counter forgot half your order or mixed it up with someone else’s, and you end up with fish burgers and apple pies.  Cooking vegetables doesn’t take long, and sometimes it’s only a matter of minutes before they’re ready. Ad a roast chicken or fried tofu and some rice to it, and there is your meal: in the blink of an eye.

Excuse number two: I don’t have the time to cook.

You can cook a dish of whole meal pasta or brown rice in advance and leave it in the fridge to be reheated when you need it. You can also prepare salads and soups for the next two or three days. Ad a can of tuna or some feta cheese to your salad, as well as crusty bread or rye bread, and you have a complete meal. Hard boiled eggs can also be used, sliced or chopped up. It’s easy to steam a few vegetables and make a quick omelette. And if it’s all you’ve got in your pantry,  a simple can of baked bean with a slice of whole grain bread and a piece of fruit make a nutritious meal. If you decide to have take aways after all, there are healthier options besides burgers and fries. You could choose a salad or go to Subway.

Excuse number three: I like to socialise.

You can still socialise and eat out while following a healthy diet. Drink alcohol in moderation to complement your meal. Avoid fried dishes like battered fish and chips and have steamed fish with vegetables instead, or seafood with salad. Go for baked or mashed potatoes instead of fries, and request that your salad be served without fatty dressing but with lemon juice or balsamic vinegar instead, as restaurant dressings are usually high in fat., which makes them so creamy. Use salt sparingly and prefer pepper instead.

Eating healthy doesn’t mean you have to live like a Spartan and deny yourself all the things you love. You want to maintain a healthy balance, and the occasional treat won’t affect your overall diet negatively, unless you overindulge on high-calorie food items on a regular basis. If you eat junk food five days a week, cut down to two or three times, then only once a week and eventually only once a month if at all. Your body craves the foods you put into it. If you eat a lot of sugar, fat, salt and preservatives, your body will crave these substances. But if you eat a lot of fresh and unadulterated products like seasonal fruits and vegetables, beans, nuts, tofu, berries and Greek yoghourt, eventually your body will crave these healthy foods and you will be the person you want to be, living the lifestyle you have always wished to live.

With my best wishes for your wellbeing,

Bella